May 7, 2023
episode description
If I close my eyes and the sun don't shine will I be okay? If it was my last day on earth would I be okay?
I think so. I think I would be.
transcript
Live every day as if it were your last.
I've been thinking a lot about that phrase these days and...
Oh my god, bars. That like rhymes.
Anyways, it is really hard to live every day as if it were your last because you know that it probably is not. There is a 90% chance it is not.
And you know that there are consequences— ramifications to the decisions that you make. But I am taking a stab at doing that anyway. I'm taking a stab at making decisions that I know will make me happy right now.
I feel like I've been so focused on making decisions that I think will make me happy in the future. But why am I making decisions for a version of myself that's not guaranteed? Like why am I so focused on making the right decision for a 40-year-old Sidney or a 35-year-old Sidney when that's not the person that I am right now?
That's not the reality that I'm currently living in. Why am I doing that to myself? Why am I preparing for something that I don't even know I will be able to experience? They always say that your life can change in an instant and so why was I making decisions for moments that I might not even get to live through?
So I am making decisions that I think are gonna make me happy right now. And I'm pushing myself to dare to dream to do things that I thought was not possible in the past.
Like I would have never imagined moving to New York three years ago. I would never have imagined getting a master's in creative writing three years ago, but here I am attempting to do both of those things.
Hopefully one of these days. It's very hard, but hopefully I will get there one of these days.
Anyway, I saw Tai Verdes in concert the other day and he played some songs I was like this would be perfect for the episode that I just recorded. So I chose his song Last Day on Earth as the perfect song to go with my last episode because it made me think about living life for every second, every minute, every hour that you have and not for the minutes, hours, and seconds that you might have because I want to be happy right now, not later.
Well, I mean later too! I also want to be happy later but I definitely want to be happy now especially when my happiness later is not guaranteed.
So here is Tai Verdes' Last Day on Earth.